


I'm Done With Subtlety

by kradam_12321 (kay_elizabeth_roxx)



Category: Adam Lambert (Musician), American Idol RPF, Kris Allen (Musician)
Genre: Established Relationship, M/M, M/M Sex, Mild Language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-08-09
Updated: 2009-08-09
Packaged: 2017-10-10 12:44:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,467
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/99864
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kay_elizabeth_roxx/pseuds/kradam_12321
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This wasn't the first time they had had this conversation, but Adam's voice had never been laced with exasperated rage, as it was now. (established relationship)</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm Done With Subtlety

"I'm fucking _tired_ of this, Kris!"

Adam's fist slammed down onto the table as he shouted, knuckles clenched white. They were alone in the mansion now, so neither of them were bothering with trying to keep the volume level down.

This wasn't the first time they had had this conversation, but Adam's voice had never been laced with exasperated rage, as it was now.

"Adam, I've told you, I just need time, this isn't exactly easy!" Kris replied, voice somewhat calmer than Adam's, but still steely hard, poised on the edge of igniting.

"You've had damn _time_ Kris, it's been two fucking months! You just keep making half-ass excuses to get out of it-"

"Shit, Adam, how the hell do you expect me to bring it up? 'Hey, Katy, me and Adam are sort of fucking, 'kay, well I'm off to throw myself into the media shark tank and tell them, too?'" Kris sarcastically cut in, and he distinctly saw something snap behind the Adam's burning blue eyes as they narrowed, his ragged breaths changing to furious huffs through his nose.

"So it's just _fucking_ to you, Kris? That's all I'm worth to you? I'm your damn bootycall? ...Well you know what? I'm done being your secret fuck," Adam replied, voice dropped to a dangerous, fuming snarl. Judging by the look in Adam's eyes, Kris thought the possibility of him getting punched in the face was extremely real, but instead Adam just crashed up from the table, pushing over the chair in his way as he stormed out, not giving Kris any chance to reply.

Kris sat in shocked silence as he heard a door slam elsewhere in the house, followed shortly by a loud crash and explosive cussing.

Kris slumped forward onto the table, his boiling anger slowly disentigrating into horrified guilt as his mind reeled, _oh god oh god,_ _Adam thought he was putting it off because he wasn't interested in a real long-term relationship._ His mind furiously slammed down the surfacing realization that Adam had just left him, because that was one thing he couldn't handle, he couldn't think of that, no.

Kris got up a few long moments later, leaving the overturned chair on the floor as his feet, seemingly of their own accord, took him down the stairs to Adam's room. His stomach clenched sickly as he reached the tall oak door, resolutely shut.

"...Adam?" Kris finally called through the door, voice quiet and nearly pleading. He anticipated either an explosion or silence, and he got the latter, the silent seconds stretching on, separating them further.

Kris swallowed nervously before opening the door and slipping in. Adam was facing away from the doorway in the middle of the room, hands curled into fists at his sides, the muscles of his shoulders tightly clenched. His bedside table lamp lay on the floor a few feet away from its original position, the glass from its broken lightbulb sparkling against the light carpet.

"What?" Adam hissed, and the ice laced through his voice hit Kris like a physical blow. It took all of Kris' courage for him to cross the room, moving in front of Adam to face him. Adam's eyes were downcast and venemous, his full lips pressed into a hard line.

"Adam, listen," Kris said quietly, hesitantly putting both his hands against the other man's chest and curling them into fists around the fabric of his shirt as he tried to pull away.

"Let go of me, Kris," Adam sighed wearily, shoulders slumping, and he suddenly just looked very _tired_. Kris looked insistently up at him until their eyes met, Kris staring hard into Adam's blue gaze as he said "I didn't mean that. Not like that. I'm just so.... so scared. I'm scared, okay? I am. But I want to be with you. I want to make a life with you. Please."

He was openly begging now, but he didn't care; he needed Adam so much. "Please don't leave me, baby. I'll tell whoever you want; I'll do anything you want me to do. Please, I need you. I love you, I'm so sorry. I love you."

Adam dropped his eyes to hide the upswell of emotion in them before replying "I just want to not feel so... so damn _temporary_."

Kris' insides burned as he heard the pain in Adam's voice, and he realized how stupid he'd been by not realizing that getting to love this man was worth so much more than saving himself the pain of coming out. And Adam had had to suffer for him, waiting while he stalled.

"I just want to... to be with you. To go out in public and be able to hold you and kiss you, and... not have to pretend that I'm not in love with you," Adam continued a moment later, the longing for that to be reality clear in his voice, and Kris was overcome by a wave of love for this man.

Kris stretched up onto his toes to press frantic, soft kisses to his lips and cheeks and jaw, murmuring "We can have that baby, I promise, I'll tell everyone, I swear, I love you so much, please-"

Kris didn't realize the extent of his desperate babbling until Adam's arms encircled his waist, pulling him close as he said "Ssh, darling, it's okay, I didn't mean it, I'm not leaving you... I love you too, honey..."

Kris slipped his arms around Adam's neck and nuzzled his face against his chest, saying "I was so stupid... I'm sorry..."

Adam leaned down to sweep his lips across Kris' cheekbone, mumbling "Stop apologizing," before softly capturing his lips, his hands sweeping up under Kris' shirt to gently stroke along the smooth, warm skin of his back. Soon it was just skin on skin, and Adam coaxed him over to lay on the bed, covering his body with soft kisses.

"You don't have to do this, Adam," Kris told him, arching into his touches despite himself.

"Oh, baby, I couldn't look into your eyes and thruthfully think you don't really love me," Adam murmured against his neck in reply, meeting his gaze.

Adam made love to him, slowly, tenderly, kissing him gentle and slow as their bodies fused together, Adam's hips pumping smoothly as he claimed his place inside Kris' body. And this was different, better, passionate and permeated with love as much as lust, gentle caresses and slow kisses, their noises of pleasure melting into symphony as they reached completion together.

When it was over Adam cuddled Kris up to his chest, curving around the other man and holding him close, stroking softly through his damp brown hair.

"I love you, you know that, right?" Kris asked quietly, nudging closer to his lover as his breathing gradually slowed.

"I know, darling, I do," Adam replied, stroking his jaw lightly. "Me too."

Kris closed his eyes, sighing sleepily. Everything was okay, now. He'd meant every word of every promise he had given Adam, and he was finally going to follow through.

He was going to get through this, with Adam by his side.

~

Kris sighed into the warm breeze, shifting to walk slightly closer to Adam as they moved along the sidewalk. They were out today with the purpose of looking for clothes for the finale, only a short two days away. Their bodyguards trailed behind a bit, giving them their space.

Their fight was still fresh in Kris' mind, and he was proud to know that he had finally done something to achieve what Adam, and what he himself, yearned for.

"So... I called Katy last night."

From the tone in Kris' voice there was no mistaking the reason behind the call, and Adam turned to him, eyes widened slightly. "Oh, Kris, I'm sorry, how did she take it?" Adam asked him, sounding concerned.

"Not too bad, actually," Kris replied, looking down at his feet with a small smile on his face. "She said she had sort of thought something was going on. We agreed on divorce. And I'm fine with that." Those words were completely sincere. Kris would always love Katy, in a way, but he loved Adam like he'd never loved anyone else. "We can finally have all of that, baby."

Adam smiled down at him, and the look of joy that broke across on his face as he pulled Kris into one of their tight, intimate hugs, was a look that Kris never wanted to leave his perfect features.

They parted and continued walking before their bodyguards could get too impatient, Kris resolutely holding onto Adam's hand.

"Subtle," Adam chuckled, swinging their linked hands a bit.

"I'm done with subtletly," Kris quietly told him, smiling up at his lover and stretching up onto his toes to kiss him. ﻿


End file.
